Sometimes even though I love where I live, I sometimes wish I didn’t move away from my home town, or that my Nan had moved closer to me instead. Been told today that she’s currently in hospital with slight inflammation of her pancreas, and she’s being kept in and put on antibiotics. 

I hate not being able to see her or speak to her to make sure she really is ok, I hate the idea of her being in hospital, being ill…it terrifies me. 

My nan has a lot of health issues, she’s got rheumatoid arthritis and osteoporosis which is an autoimmune disease that causes her pain literally from head to toe, she’s got multiple parts of her back that’s just crumbled, and her rib cage almost sits on her hips because of her back. Her hands are badly misshaped as it effects the ligaments in them as well as her feet. She still lives independently and drives, but it’s horrible knowing she’s in constant pain and there’s nothing I can do to help her. 

I really hate the thought of people I love being ill. Even if it’s just a cold. Even more so when I can’t be there to look after them. My mum spoke to a nurse on the phone but I won’t be convinced she’s really alright until I hear from my Nan herself. 

I’m sure my daughter has a sixth sense; she’s been playing with a teddy bear that my Nan gave her when she was a baby that she hasn’t played with in ages, and she’s just been carrying it round and cuddling it- she also picked up the tablet and said “Grandma on?” Because she knows we talk to her on Skype most days. 

I just want an enchanted mirror like in Beauty And The Beast, where it could show me my Nan so that I could keep an eye on her. 

I wish I owned my own house that was big enough to have her living with me and my daughter so I could look after her, so that she could have like her own little flat so she had her own space if she wanted peace and quiet. Times like this I wish I was rich with unlimited money to make the other wishes come true. 

Please be OK Nan, please make a full recovery. Please. 

🔹immeamy, you’re you, and that’s the best way to be🔹


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